Toni-Marie











{May 3, 2009}  

Be, and I’ll just watch you,
‘Cause being is just too hard for me.
-Soul Desert by Julian Cope, 1992

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{April 30, 2009}   Sick like swine…

I’ve been a sick little chooky for the past little while. I even took a day off sick on Sunday, and spent it in bed, but alas the real world calls and I’m back at work. Even though I probably shouldn’t be. But hey it could be worse, it could be swine flu?! Or is it?! No I had it long before swine-flu broke world wide, and I haven’t had any recent trips to Mexico. Although, I must say I do feel for the poor hospitals  who must be seeing all the hypochondriacs out in full force.

I’ve been planning and plotting my return to the real world. I really don’t feel like I’ve been living as much as I could be lately. It kind of came to a head today, when I made some decisions I probably needed to make before things got to the point they did, in regards to one particular person. I’m realising that I have the potential to hurt certain people in much the same way other people have the potential to hurt me. And it’s not exactly a good feeling. Things can feel completely superficial and vain in my head and somewhat deep and profound to someone else.  In some ways it makes me feel the need to censor myself more. In the end though, I can’t constantly censor myself for the sake of others feelings and nor will I. I am who I am.

Also for future reference, unless I’m totally into you, which is unlikely, romantic gestures creep me out.



{April 22, 2009}  

heart
i miss you in my life



I’ve started toting around a little book, in which I’m writing particular things into. Getting ready for my future. I don’t want to say too much about it, but I’m excited, I’ve got a head full of ideas floating around, and once I start getting some plans put into place it’s all about seeing which parts of my plans are viable. I don’t want to change the world, I just want to start a revolution of my own.

I’m excited, but this time I don’t want things half assed, and I wont be putting it into the hands of others, because I’ve been burned. In saying that I’ve burned others too. But this time, at the start it’s going to be me and only me. Something to limit the fall out.

My riddles confuse and delight. But eventually it’ll all fall into place.



{April 20, 2009}  

I feel like I’m forever playing catch-up on my life. I don’t seem to have time for much of anything anymore. Oh the joys of shift work.

Easter was pretty much non-existant. I worked on Good Friday, Saturday, Easter Sunday and Easter Monday. I did get to spend Easter Sunday Arvo with the boy though, he’s still making his way through his wonderful bounty of chocolate. I didn’t feel like I went overboard on him for a change, but the amount of chocolate he ended up with, and presents, he still somehow manage to get spoilt rotten.

I decided after the easter break, that I was feeling pretty run down. So I decided to go feral for a few days. I packed my bags, which consisted mainly of track pants, books, and flet shirts, and caught the next bus out of town, heading bush. I spent the time reading, and sitting on my bum enjoying the good weather. I literally didn’t brush my hair for two days and had the whole Cory Kennedy unbrushed hair look going on.
It was semi-relaxing, and it was quite a bummer coming back to reality. I could have used a bit longer.

But alas all good things must come to an end. And I must say I was mighty happy to get home to a hairbrush.



{April 14, 2009}   Going Feral The Survival Kit

Going Feral
After working all easter long.
I’ve decided to go feral for a few days.
The next two days will consist of reading, lots of flannalette, no phones, no television, no people, no distractions, and bus rides.



{April 7, 2009}   Update

WordPress ate my post! I am not happy. Apparently it does not approve of my use of bullets.



{March 19, 2009}  

One time a pretty girl came up to me at a cocktail party, and she asked me,
“What are you doing these days?”
“I am committing suicide by cigarette,” I replied.
She thought that was reasonably funny. I didn’t. I thought it was hideous that I should scorn life that much, sucking away on cancer sticks. My brand is Pall Mall. The authentic suicides ask for Pall Malls. The dilettantes ask for Pell Mells.

-Kurt Vonnegut


{February 27, 2009}   Be there

Mickey Avalon Tour



{February 27, 2009}   Forthcoming…

I know, I know neglectful. But this past little bit has been hectic. Proper update coming soon.

Forthcoming;
+adventures with my boys
my soul mate leaving on a jet plane to wrestle crocodiles
+hair cuts
crying in airports multiple times
+the new member of my family, my baby girl

+and front row hookups



et cetera